Tuesday. 3:07 pm.
Or is it 15:07? Should I try to swap my old way of telling the time into this decidedly Quebecois version?
(I’m impressed with myself that I spelled Quebecois correctly the first time without needing a spellchecker. I watched Mrs. Doubtfire in a tiny theatre last night (that sat about 25 people and had a projector playing the video that was run by a DVD player (there’s no way that was legal)) There was a scene where s/he was helping her/his daughter with spelling homework. Do spelling tests exist anymore? I doubt it, the way all children are required to have laptops as school equipment nowadays).
Now it’s 3:12 15:12 (old habits die hard.)
I’ve started a mantra practice. It rounds out my every evening. I push mala beads through my fingers and sit in peaceful stillness. I’m trying to recapture my ability to meditate. I seem to have lost it. Where has it gone? It took its friend, my ability to get things done, along with it. I’m trying to find both of them again.
With school out my schedule is tilted into disarray. I had a one week internship that didn’t last long enough to embed a habit of getting out of bed at a decent hour. Though, let’s be honest, I’ve never been able to get out of bed at a decent hour. Isn’t that why I live literally four minutes from locking my apartment door to sitting in a seat in class? Yes, as least I’ve set things up for success. That, and I have an incredibly long stride.
So here I am, a Tuesday afternoon, wondering about how it is that people get stuff done.
Varying tasks helps. A short walk to get blood flowing, a quick sweep of the bedroom floor. Some light tasks to distract me from what I’m trying to do. Then I return to my desk and check my email for the 14th time in 26 minutes wondering why I am not managing to get anything done.
Because what I need is a mind shift.
It’s somehow been drilled into me that “getting things done” means some huge and elaborate task has been completed. What about the tiny, seemingly insignificant ones? What about brushing my teeth this morning (wait, did I brush my teeth this morning?) What about that swept floor, or how the balcony garden is watered or the guitar’s strings are still slightly vibrating with regular use?
I want to feel in my bones that all the little things I do in my day amount to something.
That even spelling “Quebecois” correctly without using spell check is something.
So congratulations, all you underachievers! Let’s raise our arms together with the solidarity that yes! We got something done today!
Guenevere Neufeld 